Challenging Charity

Sitting at our booth that we always sit at whenever we have a meal at Denny's, I tried to entertain the boys while we waited to be served. We don't eat at Denny's very often, maybe once or twice a year at most (you know, when one of us has that crazy pang for French toast and sausage drenched in sweet, sweet syrup!), so whenever we've gone in we have always been seated unintentionally at the same booth. It's set back in a cozy, little corner and sort of makes it feel like 'our' booth. It always feels so much like how family time is supposed to be when we head to Denny's, as odd as that sounds. This time, however, was particularly difficult for me because the boys were extra hungry and extra anxious (note, extra wiggly!). They wanted nothing more than to climb under, over, on top of and all around that booth and made it clear that Mom and Dad's protests wouldn't be tolerated. They had excitedly picked out their food that had an outer-space theme, but that fad died soon after the menus were picked up and taken away. Then their interests went right back to climbing Mt. Momanddad. We were so preoccupied with settling the boys down that we hardly noticed a quiet, elderly couple choose a table in the center of the room to eat at, and another family with kids at a table nearby. Our food arrived a few minutes later and we all enjoyed our meals as we chatted over this, that and the other.

Not 5 minutes before we were about to leave, the older woman came up to our table and started to compliment the boys on how cute (and well-behaved, ha ha!) they were. I thanked her for the compliments and as I did so, she stuck out a hand to Bruce and in it was a coupon for 10% off an entire order. She insisted that we use it up because they already had a different coupon they were using and surely wouldn't use this one before it expired in a month. We thanked her again and then she hurriedly went to the next family and gave them a coupon as well before rushing out the door to meet up with her spouse.

'What a nice thing to do for complete strangers!' I remember thinking to myself. I thought about it a lot as we drove home and over the course of the next few days. It was just such a nice reminder that sometimes there is so much good in the world that may be so insignificant to the giver, but so grand that it can put a smile on our faces and a warm glow in our hearts when we are the receiver.

A few days ago I was reading the blog of a dear friend of mine, Noelle from Noelle's Noodle, when I read something that really stuck with me. I asked her permission to share it here, and she agreed to it, so I have. Here it is:

After we left Wal*Mart this young guy came up to the van holding an adorable, large Teddy Bear that he had just won from one of those Claw-Catching-Vending-Machines. Apparently, he’s really good at those games (or he’s got a lot of money to spend and time to spare) because he said that he always gives away his winnings to the first family he sees.

I said, "Well, thank you very much!"

And he said, “You’re welcome! Have a great weekend!”

Wasn’t that so sweet? The boys loved it!

This excerpt jumped out at me and brought thoughts of the lady with the coupon from a few months ago flooding right back to my mind. I had forgotten, and I hate to forget things like this. These random acts of kindness that people do for one another. That people do for me and my family. That people do for my friends, and my loved ones. It left me pondering events in my life that I considered random acts of kindness and one in particular couldn't escape me.

Earlier this year we had reached a stumbling block, as so many people do from time to time. I was dealing with a major health issue that was causing me a lot of pain and discomfort. I blogged about that and although I had shared that bit of information with my friends, my emphasis was how we were in a tight spot at the moment. I thought nothing of it, as I was just venting my frustration with our situation and my feelings of helplessness, but a few days later a card arrived in the mail and tucked inside was enough money to cover the basic cost of the treatment I really needed to relieve the pain I was in. I was taken by surprise because I didn't consider this to be a particularly good friend who would care so much as to send money, so I was reluctant to accept it at first. My initial response was to sit down and write a card to send back with the money inside, explaining why I couldn't accept the money (we needed to provide our own remedies to bad situations) but how I appreciated the gesture. Ugh. I was in so much pain, though! How could I refuse it? I really turned it over and over in my mind and finally sought the counsel of a friend who convinced me that I should humble myself to the gift because, not only did I need it at just that very time, but the person who sent it would likely be deeply offended if I returned it. I know that this friend was probably right.

My husband and I decided to keep it and use it for the treatment I needed, and we did. I was so, so very grateful for that act of kindness, as stubborn as my pride was before I would actually accept it and use it. I later came to find that this person who sent the money wasn't really the type of person with whom I could be friends with, and I'm sure they felt similarly about me. They valued things that I didn't, and I valued things that they didn't, so in the end we went our separate ways but I never did, and never will, forget that one random act of kindness that truly benefited me and my family at a very trying time. That was one thing that this person and I both valued and strived for, compassionate hearts, and I am glad that I can acknowledge this person's good traits as opposed to those that I don't agree with. I don't know that this person believes they truly did something right by doing what they did, but I hope they don't regret it. I didn't tell them, but I vowed to return the favor by doing something for someone else when things were back to normal for us. I really did appreciate their gift.

A few months later in spring, my family and I did have the chance to turn around and do something for someone else in return for that favor. I hope that those whom we chose not only enjoyed it, but that they continued the repetition in one form or another - by doing something so small but with such impact that the next person can do nothing more than be inspired to also continue on with it. I can just imagine how many people we all can touch when we each take the time to do something simple and kind for someone else whenever someone else does something kind and simple for us. I am very glad that Noelle took the time to add her story into her blog so that I could reflect, once again, on the amazing abilities we have to touch and impact one another as loving and charitable human beings.

I don't believe that we have to be all sweets and sugar all of the time (heaven forbids me to), but sometimes when we feel prompted to, we can share such treats with those around us and make this world a better place. (Did anyone else hear Michael Jackson when reading that? *LoL*)

I am challenging myself now to make a more thoughtful and inspired effort to reach out and hand someone a coupon, share with them the dime to get them through, provide them a safer place to gather for meals, give them a soft, stuffed animal to hold on to, or any other random acts of kindness. I love to help people, but sometimes I feel that I can't do nearly enough when a task is overwhelming so I end up doing nothing at all. That doesn't sit right, so I am permitting myself here and now to make more of the simple acts of kindness. The ones that just might mean as much to someone else as those that have been passed to me were.

And I challenge you to do the same.

Smiles Unlimited

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Silence.
Sitz baths.
Crisp, white walls.
New, bright light bulbs.
Waking up for breakfast and getting another nap soon after.
Going to bed with damp hair and waking up with a mop.
Little kids' burps.
Little kids' smiles after they burp.
Thin slices of cheddar cheese.
Soft baby blankets.
Finding an old note written by a friend. (Thanks, Julie!)
Cold toddler toes.
The sound of breathing.
Fingers running through your hair.
Black and white photos.
Anticipation.
Excitement.
Marshmallows that 'tickle'.
Chubby bunnies.
The sound of coins clinking in a child's hand.
Grey skies.
Cool air.
Fall.

Unrestricted Bliss

First camping trips.
Toilets that flush.
Smiles.
People who are a tad on the geeky side and love things long time, like me.
Family.
Extended family.
Blogging.
The taste of red licorice.
Cards in the mail.
The colors black and sage.
People who express themselves creatively.
Correct spelling and good grammar.
Eating smores without getting all gooey.
Waking up to a star-filled sky.
Comfortable beds.
Patience.
Air conditioning on a day over 73degrees Fahrenheit.
Yawning.
Stretching.
Chewing gum that makes your breath smell like Lemon Pledge.
Time alone.
Fresh air.
The smell of campfire in your hair.
Homegrown vegetables.
Wise husbands.
Encouragement.
Belly buttons.
Dutch apple pie.
Dutch apple pie a la mode.
Second helpings of dutch apple pie a la mode.
Mick Inkpen.